I need a bubble wrap suit for Xander.
The other night I had the big boys get in the tub while I went down the stairs to put the babies to bed. The tub is directly over my bathroom so I can hear everything above me. I was brushing my teeth when I heard the following:
Xander: Cannonball! (Giant THUMP and a splash and some sliding noises.)
(Both boys cheer)
Xander: Cannonball! (Giant Thump and a splash and some sliding noises.)
(Both boys cheer again)
Xander: One more time, with a twist!
(I run and grab the intercom phone because it is faster than running up the stairs)
Me: Isabelle, get the boys out of the tub now!
(Running feet, muffled conversation and groaning from boys)
A few minutes later Xander comes downstairs.
Me: So, what were you doing?
Xander: Oh nothing, just standing on the edge of the tub and jumping in like you do at a
Me: (As calmly as possible) Sweetie, the tub isn't a swimming pool. That can break the tub or make a big splash and hurt my floors in my bathroom. You could get hurt too. What do you think could happen?
Xander: Well, I could slip and break my ankle or my leg or my arm or I could split something open and bleed all over and die.
Me: Okay, you have thought this over. So, why do it?
Xander: Because it's awesome, mom!
I feel this is an appropriate time to request that anyone who ever gets Xander a present at any point in his life should just give him gift certificates to local hospitals and/or first aid supplies. Please.